Democracy of Silence

We as a country are proud to call ourselves democratic. We are often denoted as the world’s biggest democratic experiment. Never mind that it doesn’t mean much to any of us mango people. Students prosecuted for cheering the neighboring country, artist jailed for a cartoon, a self-righteous group (ironically named Shiksha bachao andolan) decides what this country will read, prosecution for a criticizing face book comment; Anything that’s offence to anyone is deemed objectionable and removed from the public eye. This sense of being wronged in not just felt by the over-zealous crowds but also by the state. The level of state sponsored censorship is quite high and so ruthless and unapologetic in nature, that I fear a day will come when the government shall ban anything that doesn’t pass their test of cultural morality. Additionally they would prescribe freedom for only those which don’t ‘hurt any religious sentiments’ after seeking the blessing of 2000 odd gods & goddesses. Controversial works of art and cinema are banned, writers are jailed…is this the freedom of cultural expression we reguaranteed in our constitution?  When did we become the nation of intolerance? India wants answers, but only those which it approves of.

 Dr Ambedkar said “the roots of democracy are to be searched in social relationship, in terms of the associated life between the people who form the society. If a small section of the society is allowed to manipulate the cultured symbols of the society that process becomes undemocratic and destructive” The maker of our constitution envisioned a different India than the one we reside in today. In this India, I may be persecuted by kangaroo courts and moral crusaders just for having a different opinion or believing in a different ideal. The majority’s constitutional freedoms take a back seat when it comes to protecting sentiments of the few or sometimes the lone individual taking it up on himself to represent his community.

This growing intolerance for dissent has reached peak levels. A place where dissent of any form is not tolerated is a dangerously stifling place to live in. We Indians pride ourselves on being a colorfully diverse society that manages to co-exist. But this co-existence should not come at the cost of shutting down ideas that differ from the mainstream or challenge the status quo. The recent cases of Hindu outfits opposing anything and everything that offends their ideas of Hinduism, is the most glaring example of how these ‘protectors of Indian society’ are trying to censor literature to their own liking. As a citizen of a free democratic nation, I am being denied the discretionary right to choose what is right or wrong for me. Someone else’s definition of moral is being thrust upon me and with the state on their side; I am forced to accept it. Legislature, judiciary and the executive are just machineries of the institution of democracy but its spirit is to achieve a united people, not uniform people.

Innovation and creativity cannot thrive within boundaries and rigid rules and as a developing nation, India simply cannot afford to draw a dozen lines and expect its population to stand behind it. The youth today are not as bothered about status quo as the people a few years back. The new generation is growing up in a time where any offence is directly displayed on the comment section of a webpage and the internet cannot be controlled as easily as other media. Free speech and expression has created the media revolution and it will define democracy in the days to come. It is believed that the upcoming Lok Sabha Indian elections will show our democratic prowess as a nation, but any country that has shunted its critics to oblivion isn’t a true democracy in my book, nor was it in Ambedkar’s.

High on the Idiot Box

TV is a monster. It’s the reason I am up studying at 3am in the morning. Its tainted glow is why I have thick glasses that keep falling off. Its controlling device is the spark that starts a war in my household. Once you enter its world, there's no going back. Some smoke, others drink...I browse.

Being addicted to TV shows is a time consuming hobby, and surprising requires a high threshold of patience and low level of common sense. Unfortunately, I have learnt to acquire both. Hindi shows particularly demand a high level of patience. Honestly it isn't very surprising that we Indians, who have been dealing with with government officials on a daily basis have accumulated these skills over the years.

TV depicts the local population, the emotions, life and hardships of the people. It’s a reflection of the society. I guess the rest of us live in Uganda then, as I haven't been able to find a single woman with that level of makeup on their face, living in huge bungalows, doing nothing but preparing for Puja, festivals or weddings. The vamps plot against anyone and everyone, plan things to the tee and execute them with precision. They show mind-blowing dedication in ruining others lives for absolutely no profit or gain of their own. If this does indeed depict India, then god help the bahu. Every scene in the show will play out at least twice, lest we forget what happened 3 seconds ago. The writers though have a simple yet taxing job. Every episode must contain around 20 dialogues, so not much work in that area. But they still have to keep a phenomenally ridiculous plot alive for 7 years, so I don't envy them. Who in their sane mind watches these shows? 1.2 billion Indians (according to the utterly flawed TRP system)

But then, TV does create this beautiful world where everything is as perfect as Hanna's hair in PLL.  I would love to believe that the health care system in America is as efficient as it is in 'Grey's Anatomy' or the world of law is as sexy as its shown in 'suits' but this tiny little nagging creature called common sense keeps buzzing incessantly. So, I increase the volume and change the channel.

 

Familiar faces, battling their demons. In the perfectly casual hair and clothes. 

Tansen had little idea about the greatness that his raga would achieve

It would be a sin to not write about Malhar. With all the emotions, insecurities, friends and adrenaline involved malhar is something that every aspiring writer's muse.

It’s a tumultuous ride, there are times when it seems like too much to handle and times when the sheer excitement is unbelievable.

They say most of Malhar is a big hype. Maybe. For an outsider, malhar is nothing but a chaotic crowd. But for many volunteers, its life

To be honest, Malhar never was or will be my life. It won't dominate and influence me to that extent of saying that it’s all I care about now. But it certainly had an undeniable effect on me.

Last year, I was intimidated by the sheer size of Malhar. It was dominated by the seniors, speaking a language I cannot comprehend. All in all, it scared me off. 

I still don't know what prompted me to apply this year, but I did. It was like taking a plunge into something that terrified me- a whole new group of people, talking to them, interacting, and making new friends. I had just recovered from my first year of learning new faces, and now I had to do it again. And that too with seniors ; the mysterious creatures from the land of hugging.

When I went for the first conclave meeting, I had second thoughts right before I opened the door. I mentally calculated how difficult this would be and all the other things I could be doing with my time I took a deep breath a willed myself to open the door. Before I could, someone else did from the inside. And then I was sucked into this vast being called 'workforce'

The first meeting was..Interesting. Learning new names and faces, talking to a few. At that moment, I thought I didn't belong. Everyone around me was talking to the few friends they already had, and I was staring awkwardly. This other girl with pretty curls was doing the same. And then we noticed each other and started talking.This story doesn't end with pretty curls turning out to be my soulmate or best friend. This story doesn't have an ending.

Over the next few weeks, we worked as a team. It’s amazing how people with nothing in common can bond over a single thought that they share. Amazing that a person like me, who is perfectly comfortable being alone rather than being sociable can actually make friends amidst a unique brand of craziness called Malhar. The constant debates, discussions, jokes, singing, long breaks and some meetings where breaks were longer than the meeting itself! I doubt everyone in that group will remember me, but I know that a few will. I know that over the past few days, as exhausted as I was, it was easier to be dead tired with the group. Returning back to the gcr, had this feeling of coming home after a day's work. The OC and the OGs will always be remembered. Those moments spent with the department, the events, planning, execution, crazy insider jokes and the secret Santa will all be cherished. Malhar gives you a feeling of belongingness, that you are a part of something huge, something which has a system and life of its own.

I feel everyone in Xavier's should participate in one festival or the other. It opens your mind to so many things you didn't know about your college or even yourself.

So for me, Malhar isn't life. It’s one of the many experiences that I will carry with me forever.

Epiphany: The unavoidable chick flick moment

'Change is constant and inevitable' 

A whole year after starting college, I can now say that the transition from school girl to college chick is now complete. 

First year in college was a train journey into a tunnel, I couldn't see the light at the end and it’s frightening. After every major decision there was rethinking of choices and countless doubts. I don't know how I made it through without quitting or giving up on myself. Though my fears seem silly now, back then they consumed me.

Company. We humans crave for company. Someone to talk to, someone to be with. Even the most anti social person on earth, needs at least some kind of company at one point in his life. That single word 'friend' was what had given me sleepless nights. A constant brooder by birth, I couldn't fathom the idea of venturing into a new life all alone. Safe and sheltered in my school where I was constantly with someone, always talking, gossiping in a group. Always. Surrounded by a group, not a moment alone. When college hit me right in the face with that very concept, it did take me some time to find my footing. But eventually, I did. Today I don't just crave company, I crave good company. Xaviers has indeed changed me. I have finally arrived. I have a personality, ideas, thoughts, emotions and a lot more which I never knew I could gain. Opening your mind, being unique, all of these were almost impossible for me. I was extremely cautious about other people opinions. Looking back at that girl now, I feel like a see my doppelganger. 

My idea of college life was the one popular culture had painted for me, hanging out with friends all day, bunking lectures, going out to parties. None of these have happened yet. But I have hung out with friends in the corridors talking about the most unusual things, I have spent hours in a library reading wonderful books, met many different kinds of people, debated on political ideologies, found my niche, travelled in local trains, met ladies from different walks of life, worked my way towards making up my mind as far as career is concerned, found solace in solitude....and I am still traversing through my college life. Nothing ever happens like you think it will. But when it does, it leaves you spell bound to see the whole picture just come together by itself.

I don't know if what I have today will last forever, I don't know if these friends will be around for long or just pass by..But one thing is know is that I have gained invaluable experience which has changed me. Completely. Now this change is for better or for worse? That’s a question only time will tell.

Behold the infamous mumbai monsoons

Its that time of the year again. The time when whole of mumbai celebrates the annual boating festival right in our lanes and galis. Its the monsoon! Its the only time when the BMC is cursed more than the congress. The time when our city turns into a battleground for the motorists and the potholes. Isn't it ridiculous that a city which never sleeps,is one the major metropolitans and survives terror attacks, gets so easily defeated by a bunch of potholes and clogged tracks?

The most interesting part of the monsoons is the varied reactions that it get from all over our city.The first showers elicits a joyful response. The sweet smell of wet mud, coupled with the spicy smell of hot pakoras. 

The letting go of yourself and getting drenched in the rain. The young couples sharing an umbrella, children dancing in the rain. The utter beauty in the surroundings and the joy in peoples eyes. The first shower trends on twitter and receives prime space in dailies. The old barsaat songs are played on repeat. Its safe to say that every mumbaikar enjoys this time.But like the buzz kill wise owl has said"This too shall pass" and it does.

The true sense of what we are in for comes when you step out of your house and into the trains, roads and pretty much every means of transport available in the city.People prepare for the monsoon like its the onslaught of the apocalypse.The lifeline of mumbai crashes, and so does the tempers of many. The sweet smell of mud doesn't seem so sweet when you are scraping it off your good clothes, the old songs don't seem so melodious when you are stuck in 3 hour traffic jams. Wading through water praying that you don't fall through an open manhole. Monsoon is nothing less than an adventure sport!

But who can deny that the monsoons are a season of joy..after all"yeh barsaat ka mausam hai suhana".